What He Said: The Thug Element
By: Barry Williams
HE SAID: “….so how about I get your number? Maybe we can go out sometime.”
SHE SAID: “No thank you…I don’t think so…”
HE SAID: “Why not?”
SHE SAID: “Well you are not my type”
HE SAID: “Oh…well, what exactly is your type?”
SHE SAID: “Well, I’m into Thugs”.
Who can logically explain this? For the longest, most women have always been attracted to the bad guy. Once upon a time, MC LYTE preached, “If it ain’t ruff, It ain’t right”, testifying to her love interests. Nowadays, “If his status ain’t hood, I ain’t checking for him” screams Destiny’s Child for their 2005 “Soldier” anthem. Some urban women tend to love the Block Huggers. With pants hanging low, pockets full of money minus the job and a dental plan, this thuggish attribute is appealing to her. Mentally, he is ruff around the edges and has a persona that says he is no punk and can handle his own. But how can you catch these traits upon meeting someone or from the way a person dresses? If I work a 9-5, wear slacks, shirt and tie, who’s to say that I’m not ruff around the edges?
In my research of another male’s perspective, Dave tells me: “Every woman wants a thug until (a) She gets punched in the mouth. (b) He runs up her phone bill. (c) Gets locked up for the fourth time in three months” (d) Sleeps with her best friend. Most of the so-called thugs I know fall under at least two of the four guys Dave mentioned. It’s the quick hustlers whose priorities in life include making that fast money, flossing his possessions and maintaining a violent image. Do chicks really dig that?
Kerry thinks somewhat differently from Dave. She says: It’s a power thing. It’s the strong character they possess. It’s the respect they’ve earned in the streets that in turn makes a woman feel safe. I think it’s a personal preference, which is understandable. But it has no logic if you don’t know him and base it on appearance alone. Maybe it’s a stage in a woman’s life that she outgrows with maturity. I found that most women over the age of 25 want a mature, responsible man with goals and a future.
I grew up in the hood, but I don’t consider myself a thug or hood elected. Sometimes I dress ‘thuggish’ and have my own sense of power, but how will a woman know this if my outside appearance doesn’t read: THUG?
No matter how many times I try to understand women, curveballs like this always catch me off guard.
